The Biggest Angel

I believe in angels.
Like, REALLY believe in angels.
Perhaps someday I will post some of my wonderful
angel writings about my mom and my grandma.
But today,
I awoke to the news that my friend Matt McGrory
remained sleeping.
Big Matty, God, I love him so much.
I met him at a picnic years ago.
We have been in bars drinking together ever since,
as he's a great drinking buddy.
But more special, were the times we had dinner alone.
It was hard.
He didn't really fit in any chair.
He could manuever a booth.
And people stared at him to the point where I've seen him
STTTTAAAANNNDDDD UP and confront them
He is a giant.
I think he's 7' 9", and everybody knows he has a size 29 1/2
shoe. Guiness world record, baby.
Here's what everybody doesn't know,
he was one of the finest people I've ever met.
He was SO tough, so cool, so hardcore, so smart
and he REALLY loved his friends.
He was like this little punk rocker
hidden inside an enormous frame.
If you got him alone in the back of the bar, he could
talk true shit about the phonies like nobody's business,
and hold your hand and make you feel
so loved at the same time.
He was the Giant in Big Fish.
He was the giant in Rob Zombie's movies.
He was the giant in Carnivale.
And a bunch of other stuff.
This was not just because of his stature.
Matty was a great actor.
Matt was serious and had great respect for acting.
He wanted to be a great actor, and he was.
The "hey wow look how tall that dude is" thing
would certainly wear him thin sometimes.
Like, really thin.
Especially the inevitable "how big is your...?'.
But, you know? he got it.
People are shallow and lame.
They missed out.
The ones of us that got to hang out,
drink and shoot the shit with Matty about
everything else in the world, other than how tall
he is, were the truly blessed people.
I love this man so much.
And I will miss his love and complexity
for the rest of my life.
And his hugs.
And his humor.
And his love.

This morning, after sobbing,
I realized what an ENORMOUS angel I have.
Love from above,
with a body that works right now
and is bigger than the universe.
And I am SO grateful to be one of the many
who knew him for real,
and now have an angel like Big Matt McGrory.

I love you man.